Arts Voices

Published on February 14th, 2013 | by ALN Interactive

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Relationships at uni: a smart move or expensive mistake?

Everybody needs somebody to love but is it really that straightforward? So many up and downs come with finding love, especially when you’re juggling your university studies too. So ALN decided to ask two UAL students if a relationship whilst studying is a smart move or expensive mistake.

FOR – Ralphy Nick

Loved up

To be honest I think this question is hard to answer. There are so many things to consider before making a decision this important but I believe in having a relationship while studying.

I think it’s very important that the people in question are both in the same situation i.e. both students and of a similar age.

Understanding and being supportive is crucial to a successful relationship. Nine times out-of-ten its never really given thought when you don’t understand each other’s situation.

If one person is working full-time, is a bit older, as well as being in a relationship with a student significantly younger, it may be a tough contrast. Travelling to see each other and finding time to spend together, on a regular basis, can get too much.

University is a stressful period so the enjoyment of a relationship may have to be put on hold.

However, because there is so much stress and pressure involved with studying, I think it’s nice to have someone to confide in and share the strain with, in times of need – someone to distract you from everything bad and to feel happy with.

“Not having anyone to share their problems with can also be the catalyst for getting bad grades or failing.”

It may be hard at times but I think that if you really care about the person and you both understand each other’s needs then it’s a good thing.

What people fail to remember is that a lot of people are equally upset and distressed about being single at college or university.

Some may argue that having a companion may affect your grades or performance, but not having anyone to share their problems with can also be the catalyst for getting bad grades or failing.

Depression is something that a lot of students face while in education and being single can play a part. I say be happy and date freely. Being in a happy relationship usually helps you to have a more positive outlook and that’s never a bad thing.

AGAINST – Omari Okwulu

student in the library

Stresses of studying

Some might find the idea of having a relationship during university exciting and exhilarating – someone there to spend your time with, talk to and generally have a good time – since for many students uni is an opportunity for new experiences and adventure.

Being in a relationship or ‘getting girls/guys’ is something that most students look forward to when starting their studies. However, what many forget is that your creative wings become stifled, feelings of love, lust and hormones come into play and many lose sight of educational goals they may have set.

On my own course I lost a classmate to good old dating syndrome.

Clearly this guy is still in the honeymoon period of his relationship. He considered leaving university to be with his girlfriend.

It’s not only him, I’ve seen so many students – girls especially – making rash decisions when it comes to their education because they are so ‘in love’ with their significant other. Sometimes skipping lectures to spend the morning together or missing deadlines because they decided to go on a date with their boyfriend.

“I’ve seen so many students – girls especially – making rash decisions when it comes to their education because they are so ‘in love’ with their significant other.”

Personally, I won’t be getting into any relationships during my time at university. I’ve seen how distracting it becomes.

Most people try their hardest and think it wont be them who ends up failing because of relationship problems but often it ends that way.

I just want to focus on my career and to be honest; I find most young people my age annoying, immature and clingy. All things that will be even more exaggerated while in a relationship.

Meeting the wrong guy or girl is a real concern. Worries about being taken advantage or fear of a failed relationship could all affect your performance dramatically.

A lack of focus on your course, for which most are paying £9,000, can result in failing a year, which in turn could cost you even more money or retakes.

I’d suggest getting your money’s worth and steering well clear of relationships until you have finished your studies.

 

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